"Kissing is like drinking salted water. You drink, and your thirst increases."
-- Chinese Proverb
Kissing is critical to a sensational relationship, and often overlooked component to great sex. The Washington Post summarized the findings well in their article, “Why Kissing is So Much Fun” (Nov 2, 2014). Not only does kissing feel good, it has a chemical purpose for building intimacy and arousal.
Over 65% of women use the first date kiss to determine if a second date is worthwhile. Most people use initial kissing to judge how good the sex will be. A hot make-out session is often a test to find out if there is chemical attraction, not necessarily a green light.
And what exactly is chemical attraction? A good bit of it is one partner seeking the scent of another partner with the opposite genetic code. Your mouth is “tasting” for specific pheromones. Male saliva is also laced with testosterone which is delivered into and onto your partner’s body, increasing sexual response. A good chemical match creates a response within 24 hours that is similar to addiction in the brain...we want more and we want it from that particular person.
A deep, long kiss will spike dopamine which creates desire, oxytocin which simulates love and adrenaline which makes your heart pound. Even brief kissing reduces cortisol (the stress hormone), strengthens intimacy and builds feelings of security.
Human lips pucker and purse outward unlike any other class of mammal. Our lips have a huge number of nerve endings making them an exposed erogenous zone. Engaging multiple erogenous zones at the same time heightens sexual pleasure by engaging more than one neural pathway.
Take your time when kissing. Build intensity and variety. Follow your partner's lead in intensity. Kiss more than their mouth. And follow your body's response. THE BODY DOESN'T LIE. If a kiss doesn't feel right, pay attention and honor yourself.
"Then I did the simplest thing in the world. I leaned down... and kissed him. And the world cracked open." -- Agnes de Mille